WTF: Kung Fu fighter engages in firefight with Bruce Lee impersonator

Hello, kids. You like Kung Fu? I know we do. And perhaps there’s been a bit of a reputation this series has earned for being anti-Kung Fu. Not the most unfair reading, but not the most accurate one, either. We’ve had instances of Kung Fu practitioners and “masters” clashing with fighters of other disciplines rather often. Usually the results aren’t great for Team Kung Fu.

So what if I told you that we found a bout that has more parity? A Kung Fu stylist meets a combatant claiming to be a Bruce Lee imitator. Except that the Bruce Lee aficionado isn’t quite what he seems, for reasons that will become immediately apparent.

And before we get to that, I’m asking you yet again to submit your questions to the Bloody Elbow mailbag. Reach out to us at Mailbag@BloodyElbow.com to ask questions that may or may not be about fighting. You don’t even have to be a Substack member to participate, but you get priority if you include your handle.

Time for glorious Kung Fu

Kung Fu has been around for centuries. If you’ve never practiced it, you’ve at least seen it and can recognize it. Despite the variations, the focus on balance and fluidity are at its core. And no, you won’t see a single, solitary iota in today’s video.

We’re fortunate again to have this bounty from our guy Jerry over at Fight Commentary Breakdowns. It’s almost like an episode of The Simpsons. Starts one way, ends in a wildly different direction. Behold!

So the Kung Fu guy is on the left with the grey tanktop. The Bruce Lee imitator is wearing jeans for some reason. We need to begin with the small caveat that this is a strictly boxing affair. No kicks, no jumping, no grappling. Just straight hands.

We see literally everything else except decent punches. Another caveat: the Bruce Lee impersonator doesn’t actually do anything or even dress like the martial arts megastar. But if there’s one thing I love almost as much as Bruce Lee, it’s a really bad Bruce Lee ripoff.

The Kung Fu guy takes up a boxing stance not out of place in the 1870s.

But check out my man’s punching flow, doe…

Cock back, chin up, lunge forward, wing it. That’s it. He’s spamming that one for a good minute, too. Get used to seeing that ugly punch, that’s all he does over and over again to start this off.

But you will never defeat the glorious determination of Kung Fu.

OK, maybe one decent punch in this one. Sorta. I’ll give it to him, this was nice-ish. Now the problem is that the Bruce Lee imitator gets a taste of action and thinks it’s all free. He’s gonna try to pour it on. What does that look like? Weeeeeeeeell…

And now he unloads the Tommy Gun, full drum.

Whiffs hard on that last one. Oh, well. This effectively ends the round and the fight, in a way. After a break, they go at it again but engage in a much more tentative manner. Not really worth diving further into, but man. You’d expect more flair, more panache… something cool. Nope.

And this makes me wonder sometimes… was it always like this? All these stories about martial artists facing each other in duels and all that — were there more things like this than actual good fights? I’d love to know.

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Man down

Dambe Warriors is closing out the year with some bangers, and this heavyweight battle is everything you want in a Dambe matchup. Feints, high drama, and a sensational finish.

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SAMBO submission special

SAMBOFIAS has another beautiful finish from their recent 2023 World Championshops in Armenia. Lots of fighting for position, but the end is absolutely gorgeous with one of my favorite subs.

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Knockouts galore

A channel we haven’t visited in a while is Kickboxing Tribute, which specializes in the striking arts. And today, we’ve got a collection of some of the most monstrous knockouts of the year in Muay Thai and kickboxing. If you don’t personally follow either that closely, this might change your viewing habits. Utterly devastating from start to finish.

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The Croatian Tiger

We’ll close out the week with this amazing highlight video of The Croatian Tiger, Branko Cikatic. The K-1 legend had some otherworldly power and had some dazzling performances. He sadly passed away back in 2000, but had some memorable bouts including two ruthless performances against Ernesto Hoost. You can check out a tribute account made over on YouTube for more clips.

And that’s all for this week, kids. Talk to you after Christmas. Hope you got something nice, like the latest Armored Core game. And remember – you might think you can fight, but there are many guys like you all over the world.

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